Summer of 1985 and 2020

The Morton Arboretum – Summer 2020

Summer of 1985. I was in Jamnagar, Gujarat, India. Dad was working for the last Maharaja of Nawanagar (Jamnagar) – H.H. Jamsaheb Shatrusalyasinhji Jadeja – and we lived on the palace grounds in a bungalow (single family home). We were accustomed to living in huge homes because Dad was with the Indian army for 23 years and many of our cantonment homes were similarly styled. The only difference here was that we were cut off from the rest of the city by a huge wall running around the ~50 acre palace grounds. There were many wild animals – Monkeys, Black Bucks, Indian Gazelles, Blue Bulls, Spotted Deer, Wild Buffalos, Monitor Lizards, Crocodiles and many more – roaming free, like in a private preserve. Life was royal when we first moved here. We had our tea/coffee/milk and snacks while peacocks roamed in our yard and danced to impress the peahens.

In those years, Jamsaheb did not have any sustained cash flow. He owned many large palaces all around Jamnagar and hundreds of families had been working for him from generations. ‘Eccentric’ would be a very mild characterization for him. My dad managed his operations and administration – people and property. There were months when employees did not get paid and the growing dissent would nudge Jamsaheb to travel abroad or to Mumbai. Not sure what he did there, but on his return money would be available and employees paid. There were rumors that he would sell his ancestral treasures in these trips like antique swords with embedded gems, antique jewels, gold, vintage cars etc.

My dad ended up using much of his retirement funds for our family expenses and many a times paying salaries to folks working in the palace. Now is not the time to dwell into the ‘eccentric’ nature of my dad. However, this lifestyle led to my dad exhausting all his savings and finally deciding to pursue new work in Mumbai, Maharastra, India. Since it was the middle of the school year, it was decided that Mummy, my older brother and I would stay back to complete the year. Also, our presence would be a reminder to Jamsaheb that he owed dad and needs to stick with his promise to pay up.

A couple of months into our stay, Mummy had not received any payments from Jamsaheb and money from dad was only trickling in. I’m not sure of the exact reason but we lost electricity in our home. On enquiring with Jamsaheb, we were told it was temporary and would be restored soon. Electricity and water charges were paid for by the Palace. We continued living in that home for around 7 months with no electricity and facing severe financial troubles. I was in 6th grade and my older brother in 10th. Honestly, that phase in life did not scar me for long but two stories have stayed with me till date. These are linked to Parle-G biscuits and a used cricket bat.

For readers not from India, Parle G is a biscuit brand that was super popular (and back in the 80s, probably the only nationwide brand). Not too expensive, I enjoyed them by stacking a few and dipping them in milk before devouring them (Yummy!). However, 1985 was no ordinary summer and Mummy had to ration these biscuits for me. Many times, I ate the last biscuit and had to wait for mom to buy another pack at a feasible time. Till date, I dig Parle G and love its taste and texture.

I was introduced to the sport of Cricket in 3rd grade and had begun developing good skills. During the same year in Jamnagar, I had outgrown my first cricket bat but continued playing with it. I did not want to ask mom for a new one, knowing well that we could not afford it. It was during this time that we got invited for lunch to a friend’s place and the hosting family had a son the same age as my brother. During this visit, that older kid played some cricket with me and commented on how well I was batting. When it was time to leave, he brought out a used cricket bat, which was pretty knocked up (chipped, dinged & had a shaky handle). He was planning to junk it – instead, it came home with me. I was super thrilled to have got a bat that was a good fit to my height. Since we did not have electricity at home, I had to try and finish all my school work during day hours. We used multiple Petromax lanterns around the house at night and there was a proper routine for getting them ready and started to ensure we had enough light around the house. My playing hours were cut short and the fact that we lived inside the palace grounds resulted in me being largely cut off from friends who lived away from us. Before nightfall, my mom would come to the backyard and ask me to bat. She would pick pebbles and throw them towards me, my goal being to hit them clean and far. This was her way of keeping me engaged in an activity I enjoyed.

Ringing in 2020 from Hawaii

Fast forward to 2009, when Yash was born, I was determined that my son would never experience financial hardships on account of my folly or stupidity. We have managed and planned our resources well. We live a balanced lifestyle, take vacations regularly and Yash has always lived in a home owned by us. I love buying him his sports gear and equipment. This activity gives me such joy that he would probably never comprehend. We celebrated and welcomed the new year – 2020 – in Hawaii and it started out as what seemed like another memorable year. Then our lives got consumed by Corona Virus (COVID-19) and the “normal” changed for everyone. From late February, I started working from home and Yash’s last elementary school year (5th grade) moved online. Soon it was time for his summer break and we hunkered down at home. Both Chitra and I wondered how this isolation would impact Yash. Little did we know then, how 2020 will go down memory lane as an unprecedented year changing social behaviors for all humans.

All through the year we have counted our blessings and have reiterated this message to Yash. He may never have experienced first hand family financial troubles, but Chitra and I have tried to instill in him a value and appreciation for his lifestyle and it’s associated comforts. I am not someone to celebrate too soon and he has many more years ahead as he further develops to being a kind human. But it would not be a stretch to say that he has value for money and has never begged/bugged us for unnecessary or expensive gifts/toys etc.

Summer of 2020 was a test for Yash and eerily similar to my 1985 experience. He was largely confined to home and had to entertain himself with whatever was available in and around the house. Looking back at the year I give him an ‘A’ grade. He made good choices and did not let COVID-19 restrictions break him. I want to go on record, listing down activities that he spent time on during this lockdown. In the future whenever I lose it with him or question his actions, I can read this blog and remember his resolute and happy energy during the summer of 2020.

Monkey Slack-line Activity – Summer 2020
Come On Papa, You Will Do It Someday!!

We had given him a choice to buy something to keep him physically occupied in our yard. After some research we boiled down to buying a monkey slack line and he was on board with that plan. Honestly I was equally excited about it and had visualized swinging my 45 year old body from it with the agility of an olympian gymnast! After a great deal of effort, we managed to hook up the line and very soon my dreams of swinging across the line went swinging along. The ‘slack’ in the line makes you (well ‘me’) feel like a sack of potatoes and my arms would give way to a slow-motion drop on the grass. Yash was initially very excited but soon realized the effort it took to swing across the line. I remember telling him to keep trying “you will be able to swing back-n-forth five times by the end of summer!” After many attempts he got the hang of using his core and soon began to enjoy the challenge. He spent many, many hours just hanging about and displaying his monkey spirit in full color. He was able to cover the 25 feet long swinging adventure and back, six times by mid summer. He had begun to develop calluses on his hands and I may not have acknowledged this enough, but I was proud! Etched in my memory is the thrill in his eyes seeing me struggle, barely making it to the second grip and falling down not so gracefully.

Yash explored creativity with his hands, building stuff. Small things with paper, hard cardboard, scraps he would salvage from packaging materials etc. We had a new neighbor move in and he approached them for empty boxes they were recycling after the move. They were very kind to share with him. That only meant one half of our basement was a war zone…sorry creative studio (!) This artist has a special ability to push his mumma’s blood pressure through the roof! I have to admit, Chitra has lowered her benchmark for tidiness for Yash. Mind you, that’s Chitra’s low benchmark, which in a majority of households would be their best home showings. He started exploring paper based models, initially these were Minecraft characters, airplanes, guns, swords, shields. Later he picked up a glue gun to create interactive gaming models. And recently he has been exploring with clay. My dad too would build stuff with his hands, like ship models, airplanes models etc. He would showcase them in local exhibitions and gift them to friends and some strangers too. There is some gene of my dad in Yash…the building part, sharing with others – not so much yet!

From Yash’s Art Studio!

His poetry writing and comic illustrations took a back seat, however he explored random activities…being Batman all day long, jumping out of closets to welcome mummy home…put together a green super hero costume – Night Vision – and wore that for many days, inside and outside home (even in the summer heat)…and recently after watching Robert Downing Jr.’s Iron Man movies he created an Iron Man helmet! He wanted to explore camping on his own (with Bambi), so we pitched a tent in our backyard. Bambi and he did make it through all night. Do note, I was ordered to be the night watchman sleeping on the family room floor to keep watch on “her” precious son!

Welcoming Mom & Iron Man Inspiration

Dad had introduced me to many classic war movies during my middle school years. So this summer with the COVID-19 lockdown, we bought a few blu-rays for our home collection. Yes I still collect (!) physical movie Blu-rays. Every weekend we had family movie nights and watched them, hopefully creating some more good memories with Yash. There were a few that Yash really liked and we ended up watching them multiple times. Listing some of these classics from our home collection: Guns of Navarone, The Bridge on River Kawai, Von Ryan’s Express, Where Eagles Dare, The Longest Day and Kelly’s Heroes. Yash’s favorite were Guns of Navarone and Von Ryan’s Express. Many of Yash’s art projects (guns, planes) were inspired from these movies and he also does an awesome German officer imitation!

Another form of entertainment, if I can use that phrase, was the 2020 presidential election. We followed key events – debates, town halls, election night etc together and it was largely limited to PBS Newshour. I was impressed with how Yash was absorbing the words spoken by both candidates and also what political analysts were sharing. Later, on election night we swapped between multiple news channels to understand how election results were being presented. Yash was very tickled by all the frenzy around “CNN Projecting Now” immediately followed by “Too close to call”.

This year marked Yash’s venture to online gaming and interacting with his friends over video (Zoom/FaceTime). He has now explored Minecraft, Pokemon and also follows a couple of YouTubers. This last bit gets me to roll my eyes, as I wonder what excitement or entertainment value it has. Watching a 21 year old live stream his game and thousands watching it. As Yash will say “Papa you are just too old to understand this!” There is a character called ‘Technoblade” and he is Yash’s new hero. Yash narrates words of wisdom (!) spoken by Techno or funny quotes by him. We (Chitra and I) have also been subject to some of Techno’s animation – music/action – videos on YouTube, multiple times. I did google him today and realized he has 3.79 million subscribers to just his YouTube channel and more than half a billion views to his videos! Someone has planned for his retirement in his twenties, while I still continue to figure out my path. Technoblade, more power to you as long as you instill more thoughts of ‘kindness’ (!) into Yash.

2020 has been a challenging year and there is much to forget. As a parent, this was a test for us. These were events outside our control and certainly impacted Yash’s school and social life. I don’t recall him bugging Chitra or me with the dreaded ‘I am bored’ statements or getting into trouble at school or at home because of all the energy he has in him. Being a single child, he either went out and entertained himself or created new stuff. We sincerely hope he carries this trait forward and leverages it more.

Bambi at Peace with the World

In closing, as a family we have been blessed to have a steady household income, a stable job, ability to Work from Home (WFH) and retain our sanity staying hunkered down at home. We have been able to contribute to some of our favored charities and hope 2021 is a better year for the world. Bambi, for sure, is the most delighted Menon this year, as he has all his humans around him…always!! Until next time, be kind.

#summer2020 #YashMenon #hope2021 #technoblade

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